Making Friends As An Adult

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Here are some thoughts on making friends as an adult – especially ones who love a good theme night!

It is no secret that making friends as an adult is challenging for a lot of people. No matter if you’re single or in a long-term relationship, a parent or not, there are challenges with each stage. Will your partner like their partner? Do our kids play well together? Will my friends like your friends? What could we possibly have in common?

Friends evolve over time based on the communities you are a part of and the schedule you keep.

When Mazen was young I had strong circle of women who hung out together nearly every day. And over time, as some had second babies and new newborn circles, our older kids went to elementary school and almost everyone went back to work, our time together was zapped. The links that held us together shifted. While I still call the women in that first moms group friends, admittedly we don’t all hang out on a regular basis like we used to.

People evolve. Schedules change. And friends change with the seasons of life. And that is totally normal!

Thus, learning to make new friends is a great skill to have.

If you’ve read my blog for one hot minute, you’ll know that the community at my gym is strong. ACAC has long since been the place where I’ve made the most friends because I see the other people in my group ex classes multiple times per week. Probability suggests that the more you see people, the more you’ll talk, and the more you’ll find out things you have in common.

Your daily community might involve coworkers, your child’s school, your church, your tight-knit neighborhood. You’ll probably have friends in all of the above areas.

Send the invitation!

The way to turn casual friends into fun friends is to send the invitation. And if you get an invitation, SHOW UP! This might start as a text to 1-2 people but it might also end up in a group text thread where you’re planning themed movie nights (haha, see below!). Sometimes I think groups are easier because it’s less intimating to have multiple poeple to chat with than one on one.

It’s so easy to sit on your couch; it’s not as easy to invite new people over or organize a happy hour at a local spot. You don’t have to host people at your house – suggesting a common spot to meet up is the easiest entry. Not everyone is going to come, but the ones that do will be the keepers. Ask for people’s numbers!

Happy Hour Turned Theme Night Group

What started as a semi-regular happy hour after a Thursday workout class has evolved into a text thread full of ideas for themed nights. We started with a holiday bar crawl in December and a 90s cover band in January. I LOVE a good party theme, so the planning process is almost as fun as the night itself! Our ages range from 26 to upper 40s, married and not, kids and not, drinkers and non-drinkers. The common theme is people who like to exercise and hang out!

Some of the regulars!

Note: Thomas is happy to have people over to our house, but he’s not into the themed nights like I am, so he doesn’t mind trading those nights out for me for lots of sports nights with the boys for him ; )

I had people over to watch the Taylor Swift concert and the Barbie movie. And we decided to dress it up for The Village!

The Village

M. Night Shyamalan’s The Village has been one of my very favorite movies since it debuted in 2004. There were several in our group who had no yet seen it, so those of us who love it were so excited to watch it with them! I found a Those We Do Not Speak Of costume on Amazon! Caked Up Cville did some beautiful red velvet bloody cupcakes for us since we were also celebrating two birthdays!

The dress code was to wear The Bad Color (red).

Sean dressed in the costume of Lucius Hunt, vest and all!

Seth put out a bunch of red-themed foods, and we all brought snacks to share.

Red Wine Tasting

During the movie, we had blind tasting of Meritage wines!

Costume Change

After the movie, we had a short discussion of how awesome it was, and then I did some red-themed song “name that tune.”

And then we adjusted costumes to head to a Tom Petty cover band a few miles away!

To be honest, I was peer-pressured into going because I am not a rock and roll girl. It was just ok 😉

But we still had a great time! It’s also worth noting that I was basically sober after the few tastes of wine because I had an early soccer game the next day. I had four waters at the concert. You can still have fun and without a hangover; just saying!