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Some thoughts on turning 41!
The past couple of years I’ve written letters about Turning 39 and Turning 40. Both years felt very significant and a big turning point in the age spectrum.
Today I’m turning boring #41.
Last night friends and I went to King Family Vineyards for trivia. It was a blast! My birthday wish today is to relax at home, go to my favorite workout class, and enjoy an easy dinner at home with the boys. Tomorrow Thomas and I have a big night out on the town.
It’s been a busy few weeks celebrating lots of Libras and Scorpios!
Some things I’ve noticed in my 40s thus far:
I still feel like a young adult
I would say my brain feels like it’s in the 33-34 age range. And to think that was almost a decade ago.
The time I feel most like a 40 year old is when we play teams of 20 year olds on the soccer field. Geez they are quick! Our team’s average age is somewhere in the upper 30s to lower 40s, and we are constantly joking about needing to retire from the main league that has too many 20 year olds running around.
My body is slowing down
Speaking of running around, I’m no longer the fastest, quickest, strongest version of myself. I feel like upon hitting 40 my mindset changed from “push yourself as hard as you can!” to “DON’T GET HURT!” In my gym classes I’m going at 90% instead of 100% because I truly fear if I went at 100 I would break or tear something. I’m still dealing with a shoulder issue that might plague me forever, but I have learned how to manage it.
Honestly I am so thankful that I am able to be active. From my foot issues during my college years, I know what it feels like not to be able to move your body, and I’m so grateful I am able to move mine how I want. Some days that is walking to and from the preschool twice and that’s what feels really good. Other days it’s a 2 hour soccer game and then a few days of rest afterwards. Rest is now a requirement.
Despite my body slowing down a bit, I am my most confident self at the gym. Fitness has always been a way for me to blow off steam, connect with others, and destress, and I always feel happy in my group ex classes. This post comes up a lot in conversation with other women my age.
Most women I talk to about body image say that their strength and ability is more important than looks. Most people aren’t willing to sacrifice life to look a certain way. I think this is both wisdom that comes with age and acceptance of what is.
Nothing is as important as sleep
I saw this funny meme recently from Emily Freeman about sleep in your 20s, 30s, and 40s:
Last weekend was packed 3 sporting events and 3 birthday parties. We event hopped both Saturday and Sunday from one to the other. And both days as we were driving home at 5pm to put on sweatpants, cook or eat leftovers, and have a quiet night in, Thomas and I remarked that we actually loved having daytime events and cozy evenings in. “We are daytime people” he said. You couldn’t pay me to stay out past midnight these days! (Actually we’re going to a concert tomorrow night and will probably be out until 11 and I’ll need all day Saturday to rest, haha.)
Life is complicated
Like a fine wine, there are layers upon layers to our lives. I am constantly fighting for simplicity while also accepting that with a husband, two kids, and a house to manage, nothing will ever be simple. While systems (like those I teach in my Digital Clutter program) help to keep me organized with all of the adulting tasks, when I get overwhelmed with all there is to do time wise, I have to remind myself to zoom out a lot and remember what really matters. People matter. Health matters.
This year hasn’t been an easy one for us. Between the stress of our renovation (logistics, moving twice and managing the finances of it all), and then some sad and complicated family dynamics that I can’t share online, there has been a lot going on behind the curtain. We have tried hard to support those who need support and do the right thing even when we have been wronged. There are question marks that I wish were commas.
Despite the above paragraphs, when I zoom out and look down at this life from a birds eye view, things are good. Being back in our house has exceeded all expectations, and on a day-to-day level things are great.
What’s next?
Next weekend: we have a fun Friday night out planned with friends (the boys are going to do a sleepover with their grandparents!) and then a 5th birthday party for Birch on his big day. Spoiler alert: it’s Star Wars themed 😉
Next month: we are hosting Thanksgiving in our new house!
Next year: we have not one but two tropical vacations planned! One just Thomas and me and one with the kids. I booked both trips 100% on credit card points and am working on an e-book training for getting started with free travel. (Someone please gift me time for my birthday so I can finish it!)
Thank you for coming on this journey of life with me another year,
xx,
Kath
Cake at 39
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